Advodad

What will be the impact of New York State’s historic legalization of Same-Sex Marriage on the 2012 Presidential election?

From my Quora feed: Unless Obama eats a baby live on television, I think it will have a minimal impact. Here’s why.

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What are the unforeseen consequences of the legalization of gay marriage in the United States?

1. Less hate crimes and bullying. The more people who can show the world that gay is normal, the less likely culturally, kids will think its cool to bully and abuse other kids who may be gay or may have gay parents. So a decrease in violence, a decrease in gay teen suicide, and a decrease in old outmoded cultural stereotypes that hurt everyone. Currently, gay teens are 5 times more likely than their straight counterparts to end their life, as they get bullied at home as well as at school.
2. It could cause more adoptions. Once gay marriage is legitimate, laws that ban gay adoption will become obsolete. That means kids will be forced to lived in houses with people WHO CARE ABOUT THEM! The humanity.
3. More awkward hookups. It will force the wedding industry to grow in profitability. More weddings means more catering. More catering means more open bars. More open bars mean more drunken bridesmaid hookups. Which either could lead to more walks of shame, or MORE WEDDINGS! Which leads to suffering. (Side note, I witnessed a groomsman bridesmaid seduction dance that led to another wedding. It was horrifying.)
4. More taxes! Not that they’ll raise taxes, but more couples will be paying them, which would mean more expansion of BIG GOVERNMENT.
5. More drunken debauchery! More weddings means more drunken bachelor/bachelorette parties! Which means more money for bars, clubs, karaoke joints, and Vegas. It better stay in Vegas.
6. An increase in clothing costs. As gay men raise more straight children, said children could have a more keen eye for fashionable clothing. This will lead to peer pressure, which will lead to their straight friends with straight parents feeling pressure to dress nicer. So straight middle class families could suffer from more money spent on nicer clothes.
7. An increase in wedding gift spending. If you are straight, and you befriend gay people, you’ll essentially double the number of wedding gifts you have to buy each year, hurting your bottom line..
8. More Cats! Lesbians living together in holy matrimony could mean an over adoption of homeless cats.
9. More Dogs in Outfits! A few gay men dress their little dogs in outfits. What will the children say!?!?!1!!

So basically the apocalypse.


What are the unforeseen consequences of the legalization of gay marriage in the United States?

What is a sweat bee?

I was teasing my wife this afternoon after she told me that when she was a kid, she used to get stung by “sweat bees” all the time. I asked her if that was some made up name from her childhood for mosquitos, thinking that there was no way some creature could actually be called a “sweat bee.” She insisted she didn’t make it up, that her father, a biologist from the USGS would have corrected her if such a thing was nonsense. Here are some things that a sweat bee isn’t, which I leaned during our conversation.

• It is not a bee that hangs out in gyms to pick up chicks.
• It is not related to the Schvitz Scorpion, the Snot Beetle or the Moist Moth.
• It does not hold meetings in Russian Bath Houses.
• It does not train for Marathons in your leg pits.
• It was not ever caught dancing with Richard Simmons, nor does it “get physical” with that lady from Grease.
• It did not invent the Beeflex.
• It does not pollinate your arm pits or sweaty back area.

However, it is very, very real, so consider this my apology for being completely ignorant about sciencey things. Say hello to the sweat bee, which is any bee attracted to the salt in human sweat.
Its the jerky insect that made me look dumb in front of my spouse. Notice there is no sweat band on its head.

According to people smarter than me, including my wife, It’s sting is as powerful as a Democrat’s strategy. That is to say, it’s on the low end (a 1.0) of the pain spectrum of another science term I just learned, the Schmidt Sting Pain Index, and is considered almost painless and completely ignorable.

I’ll let Wikipedia explain the rest: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swe…

The Sweat bee is the common name for any bees that are attracted to the salt in human sweat. In its strict application, the name refers to members of theHalictidae, a large family of bees that are common in most of the world except Australia and Southeast Asia, where they are only a minor faunistic element. In the United States, the common species are black, brown, red, or metallic green, and sometimes with yellow markings, and usually 1/4 to 1/2 inch (4-10 mm) in size. Their attraction to sweat makes them a nuisance, as they will sting if squeezed or squashed against one’s flesh. Their sting is only rated a 1.0 on the Schmidt Sting Pain Index, making it almost painless. However, individuals with allergies to any kind of insect stings should seek immediate medical attention. Pest control is not recommended due to their beneficial nature in pollination.

Moral of the story: Don’t challenge a Biologist’s daughter on matters of science and biology. You will lose.

What is a sweat bee?

What are all the arguments against gay marriage?

The power of tumblr compels me. Thanks to the encouragement of 9000 people reblogging something I copied and pasted, with the number still growing, which wasn’t anything I actually wrote, I thought it might be good to offer something of substance on my blog, now that I have 650 more people reading this who probably don’t care about pictures of my kid. So I’m going to repost a couple of my equality answers that I wrote on my favorite site, Quora. PS:  If anyone knows who created the awesome I Love NY Equality Image, let me know so I can give them proper credit in the post. 

Today’s question: What are all the arguments against gay marriage?

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